November 12th 2018
No matter if your real. Or all in my head. I’m wondering if love is even real. Like not family love or love you feel for your friends but the kind of love the talk about in the fairytales. The kind of love that you can’t imagine not spending the rest of your life with them. I think people settle for someone they can be happy with. After all the world is so big what are the odds of you finding your “perfect soul mate” I’ve had people tell me that I’m the only one for them and honestly I’m not seeing it. Why do so many people seem to find this part of me to fall in love with when I can’t even find it. It’s all a mask anyways. Very rarely do I let people actually see what I’m thinking. Know how I’m feeling. And I don’t really know if I ever will. Honestly in some ways I don’t let myself get that close. I barely know what I’m thinking let alone how to make anyone else understand. Maybe I’m destined to be alone. I hope not. I don’t know. Only two more years till I graduate give or take. Maybe in time it might all make more sense. We all make mistakes right? Some are just better at dealing and hiding them then others.